Rope Camp Memories continued…
With Gray off to the Dungeon, I grabbed his things, as well as my own, and left. I first swung by my cabin. I dropped off my shot glasses and put on my Zim jacket, as it was getting chilly. I put my flashlight in my pocket, as well, remembering the night before. All set, I walked up to 1/2 and put Gray’s things by and on his bed. I then made my way to the competition.
When I walked in, I saw that just about every seat was filled. I think most, if not all, of camp was there. I quickly found Gray, who thankfully sat at the end of an aisle. He’d given me permission to be at his knee, knowing he would not have time for aftercare following our class. I returned his safety shears, which he had lost during the presentation, but I found.
As I sat on the floor, I began to surmise the competition. Murphy and Dov each had their bottoms tied with random objects attached. I later learned these were props chosen by audience members (flippers, picture frame, goggles, etc.). I’d already heard they were only allowed sixty feet of rope, which most likely would translate into two thirty foot lengths, though this was not required. As far as the organizers cared, a rigger could’ve showed up with 60 one foot lengths and have been perfectly within the rules of the battle.
Murphy was working with his friend; Dov worked with Slut. The emcee walked out into the event area, and asked the audience to decide who had won through their applause. After three rounds of clapping, it was decided Murphy & Dov had tied, and would team up for the final.
Next up was a fetish performance by Lew Rubens. The big reveal: bungee suspension. Drea, Lew’s girl, came out in just a lacy boxer style underwear and black & white heels. Lew tied her in a chest harness, but then got to work on the bungee chord. Using multiple lengths and looping them through a pulley, Lew attached Drea to the rig. He then walked over to the wall and cranked the pulley higher with a wench.
As she got higher and higher, Drea started jumping around. Lew, once at his preferred height, took hold of Drea, pulled her back, and let go. She flew this way and that. Drea was able to jump, bouncing side to side and about.
Lew tried to hit her with different implements, but she would playfully jump away. Lew then tried to time his hits with her jumps. All the while, the audience vacillated between Ooos, Ahhs, and laughs. Loud applause followed the conclusion of his presentation.
Next up, Gray vs. Lochai. Their bottoms were Phoenix and Celeste, respectively. Before they started, Gray leaned down and asked to borrow one my carabiners; he had an idea.
As the competition began, it seemed Lochai had the same thought. Lochai immediately went to the pulley and began tying Celeste for a suspension. Gray started his tie on Phoenix, choosing to first be sensuous, but then turned silly when he began using his candy cane prop. This ended, though, when the candy cane broke. In a moment of theatre, Gray, quite manly, ripped off his shirt.
Moving Phoenix towards the pulley, Gray pulled out my carabiner and attached it, allowing him to also suspend. To impede Gray, Lochai started tying him up. Gray returned the favor, and the battle was on.
Lochai moved away, rushing off to the wench. He cranked the pulley higher as Gray rushed to complete his tie on Phoenix. As Lochai cranked, Celeste ended up hitting her head. An “ugh” cycled through the audience, but Celeste was okay. And just as it was almost too late, just as the ropes were almost out of his reach, Gray finished his tie on Phoenix.
The battle complete, the decision was left to the audience. And, once again, there was a tie. Gray & Lochai were to team up against Murphy & Dov for the final round.
The next performer up: Scott Smith. His big reveal: watermelons. Scott explained he agreed to give a rope performance if he were allocated a tarp and two watermelons.
To setup, Slut and Darian laid out a rather large blue tarp. Scott’s girl scurried to the front and put out two miniature traffic cones and a miniature barricade on the floor; I found her to be very cute.
Parker and Scott’s girl were already tied in harnesses. A large ladder was brought out. Scott had setup a few points earlier. He walked up the ladder and attached Parker to one. The ladder was them moved and Scott’s girl was attached to another. A mesh bag, filled with the two watermelons, was attached to the last. Yes, this is going there.
Scott asked for Gray’s assistance. He was instructed merely to hold Parker, pulled away from the plumb of Parker’s point, while Scott held his girl the same way. Then they both let go.
Parker and Scott’s girl crashed into the mesh bag of watermelons, and each other. One broke, and spilled a little juice and fruit onto the tarp. “Do it again! Do it again!” I was not the only person in the audience yelling; many of us were quite enthusiastic in our want for the second one to break.
Satisfying the need of the masses, Gray and Scott both pulled back and released once more. Parker and Scott’s girl once again slammed into each other, this time crushing both fruits to everyone’s satisfaction. Watermelon fell onto the tarp as Parker and Scott’s girl reached into the mesh bag and ripped out pieces to eat. Everyone laughed their asses off.
Thus Scott Smith was dubbed the Gallagher of the Rope World.
And now, for the final round; Dov & Murphy vs Lochai & Gray.
For this last battle, the rules were modified. Only one bottom was allowed. For Gray & Lochai, Phoenix and Celeste Rock-Paper-Scissored for the position; Phoenix got the spot. Murphy & Dov had a ringer in their back pocket, electing to use Lqqkout as their bottom, which technically wasn’t against the rules, but still…
The music started; the battle began. Both groups had had a quick moment time to pow wow. Gray & Lochai began by lifting Phoenix into the air over their shoulders and tying her at both ends. The trio of Murphy, Dov & Lqqkout had the brilliant idea of cutting their rope, in hopes of lengthening their strands and increasing their tying abilities. Once again, this was not against the rules, but come the fuck on… Turns out, though, their idea was not so great. Their rope soon turned to a tangled mess.
Before the round started, Gray had given Lochai his safety shears. Gray turned to Lochai and told him it was time. Lochai snipped the top of Gray’s boxers. Gray then ripped off the top pair, revealing his secret weapon: a pair of sequined, chained, awesome boxers he had purchased the first night of camp. Only I, the vendor who sold them, and CabEx knew about them; the rest of the audience was shocked and awed. The crowd roared.
But then, somehow, it became a three-on-one competition: Gray vs the Trio. Lochai took the pretty girl off into a corner while Gray was attacked from all sides. Gray tried to counter their attacks by tying them, at one point attaching a small weight to one of them.
A 5 Hour Energy dropped out of Murphy’s pocket. Gray picked it up, poured it into his mouth, and then spit it out in a burst of liquid. In the cross fire, Dov was momentarily blinded. Somehow, Lqqkout ended up with three flippers on, two on his feet and one on a hand. Gray, during the battle, had a quick negotiation with Lqqkout for a CBT tie.
There was also some wrestling between Murphy and Gray, which ended up with them grappling on the ground. Needless to say, I freaked out a little, and began yelling. “His back. His back. Oh my God, Gray’s back. Watch out for his back.” At one point, Gray and Murphy rolled over, breaking an oar in half that was one of the assigned props. (Incidentally, the two men saved the pieces as mementos.)
By the end of the second song, the only person that had any rope work complete was Lochai, who had Phoenix in a pretty tie on the side. Lqqkout, in response, rushed over and knelt beside Phoenix. Dov came over and tied a bow around Lqqkout’s hands.
Once again, the emcee asked the audience for applause to determine the winner. It was eventually decided, “I think it’s the audience that won.”
The whole event was beyond hilarious. It was one of those instances where you wished they had taken video of it because it was so much fun.
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