the life and musings of a kinky slut


With busy season for my job in full swing, I have once again experienced a bout of seasonal financial panic. I’ve shut down most of my spending, packing food for work, trying to figure out the cheapest way to park my vehicle, etc.

But there is one thing I can not and will not skimp on, one thing I allow myself to impulse buy always: music.

I’ve spoken about my love for music before, how at times it saves me (see my Twitter feed). I find myself falling in love with new artists, new sounds, new songs regularly, riding multiple waves of NME almost all the time. (NME: New Music Energy; poly folk can laugh, or cringe, as they wish).

Recently it has been three artists, one album, and two songs that have taken my heart soaring.

The first was Frank Ocean. He crafted his first solo album and released it this past summer.

I learned of his work through an NPR music review. Frankly, NPR has never steered me wrong. (And, to be completely honest, I should’ve listened to them on a negative review that would’ve saved me $12.)

Ocean has worked on other artists’ albums but this one was his own baby, Channel Orange, and I love it.

I’ve found myself repeating songs over and over, getting lost in the over arching story, imagining an entire dance performance around the lyrics.

Often, when I listen to music, my mind goes to dance, or creating a music video, shaping some sort of fantasy with the song as the background.

With Channel Orange, I saw two bodies moving over a plain stage, teasing at first, push-and-pull, but then together, connected, wrenched by each other’s love.

There is one particular song on Channel Orange that really strikes me: Bad Religion.

Frank Ocean is infamous in the hip hop and R&B world for admitting that he fell in love with a man when he was young. Bad Religion is a poetic documentation of his inner struggle. He equates loving someone who can’t love you back as a bad religion, “This unrequited love/To me it’s nothing but a one man cause/And cyanide in my Styrofoam cup/I can never make him love me.” 

The beauty and pain of this song, of this album, is more than worth your look, your time, and if you so choose, your money.

My two latest musical muses have been songs I randomly discovered. The first is Adele’s theme to the new Bond movie, Skyfall.

The story: I was waiting for a party to end, waiting to be able to breakdown the gear and go home, killing time by playing on my phone, when I pulled up YouTube and saw it as a featured video.

And then I played it. And played it. Over and over, I think at least five times in a row.

Adele’s voice is one I can get lost in, one I have gotten lost in with her other music. This song does not disappoint.

This song’s fantasy was a bit… different.

I imagined myself decked out in a tight modern dancer’s outfit, my hair down and flowing, all while also spinning fire poi.

(By-the-way, for those who don’t know, I’m pretty sure this can never happen, seeing the whole threat of my hair catching on fire and the outfit burning and sticking to my skin and all; hence why it is a fantasy.)

I saw myself jumping, leaping, twirling while spinning, gracing the air around me with the fire’s heat and my body’s extensions, lines, curves, flame and movement creating a dark dance with Adele’s voice in the background.

I haven’t purchased this song just yet, but I did make my first pair of practice poi. Let your mind go where it may.

The last song, the newest song, the now song, is less about the major name listed and more about the minor artist featured: Wiz Khalifa feat. TheWeeknd – Remember You.

TheWeeknd’s voice. His voice. Oh my God his voice. And the lyrics. The sensual, sexy, oh my fucking God lyrics. I heard this song once on the radio and immediately thought, Who is this?

After some Google-fu, I found him.

TheWeeknd is Canadian (as many fine folk are) and has yet to release a studio album (guttural scream!). He has released mix tapes, and his first studio album is due out next month.

I tried to purchase the single on iTunes, but unfortunately it is only available if I purchase Wiz Khalifa’s entire album.

TheWeeknd is another voice where I loose myself. While listening to this song, while listening to this man sing, I loose all sense of time and place and am floating on a racing roller coaster through the sky while being eaten out by his voice.

He has the kind of voice that makes me want to fuck him. Yes, it is that good.

Bad bitch, girl, I think I might get used to yah
I might have to take your number when I’m through wit yah
All I ask of you is try to earn my memory
Make me remember you
Like you remember me

I want to fuck to this song. I want to fuck to this song on endless repeat, sweaty, nasty sex, where we don’t care who hears, what anyone says, what anyone thinks. Where we get lost in each other’s body, each other’s breathing. Where we get lost in fucking.

I love this song.

I will admit I’m a little pissed I can’t get the song. I’ve found it on YouTube and have already played it three times while writing this blog. 

Sometimes, when it comes to amazing music, you just have to wait. So, for now, I’m being patient. And I keep hitting play on YouTube.

Categorised as: Link | Music | Sex

Comments are disabled on this post

Comments are closed.