the life and musings of a kinky slut

Checking In

I know I should be better about updating my blog, but, like I know I should be better about a myriad of things in my life, I haven’t been. So, a synopsis of the latest.

My brother graduated from college recently. It was an interesting experience for many reasons.

1- He attended the same college I did. (This was not on purpose. I felt the need to say that.) It was surreal to be seated in the stands when four years ago I was in my cap and gown, sitting with so many others on the basketball court. His commencement speaker was better, but boring like mine. I was happy for him, though frustrated, as was expected, by the huge crowd. I brought food I didn’t eat and a book I did read. All-in-all, a good experience.

2- My father, my older brother, my aunt (who is now VERY hard of hearing) and my step mother (so odd to say that out loud or in my head) all attended. And, yet even more shocking, it went well. I did not expect the “Lady of the House,” as my mother likes to call her, to be there.

At first, I didn’t even know it was her. It was not until my older brother said something to my father about his wife that I connected the dots. Once again, the best place to hide something is right in front of my face.

She was civil. We didn’t really talk, but wouldn’t have anyway. She and my aunt were to themselves. I chatted with my brother and father. Lookers on had no idea the family history or histrionics. It was refreshing, and something my therapist was so right about. To think for so long I expected some kind of blow up the next time I saw her. This was the polar opposite of my worst nightmare.

Since I mentioned it, therapy has been going well. My Doc has helped me with relationship issue, she makes me talk about my weight and being proactive about fixing it, and I have talked more about my feelings towards my Dad than any other time in my life. Starting therapy was defiantly a good a decision. It makes me wonder what I would have done if I had not sought help. Possible scenarios I do not like come to mind, so I’ll leave that one alone.

I’ve been writing more, which has made my heart leap. I finished my first screenplay and have given it to good friends to read over. For the next month, I’ve promised myself I will try to not think about it, giving them hopefully plenty of time for their critiques. Instead I’ve worked on short stories that have the potential to develop into something more. One leans more towards action. The other is more outlandish satirical comedy. I do not know where they are going, but I know the road to their destinations will be interesting to travel.

My SO and I will be moving into together sometime this year. The roommates are looking to buy a house and my SO does not want to move with them. In a moment of insecurity, I asked the hard question that came to mind a day or two earlier. “If your roommates don’t buy a house, will you still move in with me?” The simple “yes” response made me feel reassured. Once again, thanks to the Doc for teaching me good relationship practices.

It’s quiet in the office today, just like I like it. With any luck, and motivation, I will work more on my stories, in hopes that one day my stories will be my work.

Categorised as: Emotional | Family | Random

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