poeticdesires

the life and musings of a kinky slut

Archive for the ‘Family’ Category

1.31.17 Family —

My Uncle is in the hospital. My Mom is handling it as best she can. I just got the phone call tonight. I could hear in her voice before she explained the situation how bad it was. He’s in a lot of pain. My Uncle and I have never gotten along. We are the antithesis […]

Grateful, Nice Edition —

I sat at the kitchen island, my latest Santa hat beginning to take shape.  As everyone began to form a circle, I put my project away, stood, and held hands with a brother on each side.  My older brother, in whose house we all stood, was on my right; he said the blessing. After his prayer, I took up […]

Going On —

My Dad died tonight. I haven’t cried yet.  There have been tears, and one bought of wailing, but that all happened when he was still alive.  When he still clung on through labored breaths. I thought I was going to curl up and cry after I got off the phone.  I talked to my Mom […]

EMDR —

We started with a memory, a strong memory that incited a negative emotion.  I described the memory to Doc.  He had me close my eyes.  Travel back to that moment, back to those emotions, sit in those feelings.  The tears easily came. “How do you feel?” “Forgotten.  Not thought of.  Alone.” “On a scale of […]

A Message, An Hour —

My father is in the hospital.  The first thought that ran through my head when I got the news was, My brother is such a douche bag. He left me a voice mail; I missed his call because I was at work. “Dad’s in the hospital.  He fell and broke his hip.  He needs surgery.” […]

Kids —

[Trigger Warning: This entry features a description of childhood sexual abuse.] I love my niece. She’s about to turn four this summer. She’s a ball of energy: running, jumping, crashing into walls while cackling. Today, before she, her parents and I headed out, I assisted her in putting on her socks and shoes. I grabbed […]

Why? —

I’ve been asking myself that question a lot lately, mostly because of a friend’s influence, although Doc has been encouraging it as well. In regards to my theatrical career, there is one person who I believe owes most of the credit for my current circumstance: Mr. David Kriebs. He was the Production Manager for the […]

My Brother Is A Douche —

I don’t want to write this blog. But, because it’s me, I kind of have to. Yesterday I spent some quality time with my younger half-brother and my father. As always, it was awkward. My father is emotionally closed off, and my brother and I have learned much the same habit. Often during our dinner, […]

Opening the Box —

Everyone is a good liar from one hundred feet away. It wasn’t a big lie. In fact, it was a tiny one I’m sure everyone has told some time, if not quite often, over the course of their lives. A friend, who happened to spot me standing, looking about at the gathered folks at the […]

Family —

“It was great meeting you, even though it took til now.”“Yeah, well, that’s life sometimes.”“Yes, but you’re family.” My Father’s Day was such a mindfuck on multiple different levels. I’ve already blogged about taking my brother to a sex shop (See: A Good Start). What I haven’t talked about, though, is the cookout we went […]