poeticdesires

Category: Funny

  • Elevator Entertainment

    The final night, the final hours of WinterFire, of course I didn’t want to go to bed.

    I found myself in the lobby of the hotel discussing possible cookie snagging with TwistedView & Dov. In our conversing, I learned of the secret (not really) rope folks lounge up on the ninth floor. With the allure of sugar at almost 3am, the three of us headed up the elevator.

    But then, magically, we were treated to a show.

    Looking out of the glass elevator car, we happened to see some hot people having lots of hot kinky fun. Not ones to pass up an opportunity, we pushed the button on the elevator to take us back down to the 7th floor. We realized the action was actually happening on the 6th, so we lowered ourselves down, but not before I became quite giggly and super excited.

    “It’s Jim! Oh my God, it’s Jim!”

    Yup, Jim was fisting a lovely woman on her bed, curtains open, lights on. Not only that, there were others in the room, including her partner, who held a fuck-saw; there would be more fun for her later.

    To keep the elevator on the correct floor, TwistedView slipped his bag in between the doors. When the car eventually made its mean noise, we removed his bag, but we had already pushed the buttons for the 5th and 7th floors.

    As the elevator traveled down, I hopped up trying to keep my view. On the correct floor, I stood, still hyper and giggly. One floor above, I crouched down low, trying to keep my excellent view.

    As we three watched the show, Dov realized he knew the lucky lady. He took out his phone and called her; no answer. Instead he left the lady a voicemail, complete with TwistedView’s and my voices in the background wishing her well.

    Our magical elevator time could not last forever. Because it was so late at night, we did partake in the fun for about ten minutes. Eventually, though, the car was called up. We accepted a group of folk, and then treated them to a brief view of the show on our way down.

    Dov needed to grab his bag from the Dungeon and I stilled wanted my cookies. TwistedView and I headed up; Dov went down (snicker snicker).

    TwistedView led me to the lounge area. There was soda and chips and salsa and fruit and hummus, but no cookies. So instead we ventured back to TwistedView’s room. K2 is an excellent baker; TwistedView, quite graciously, gave me the last of a bag of her cookies. I hugged him goodnight.

    Ready to head back downstairs, I ran into Dov. Detoured back to the lounge area, we sat and chatted.

    About ten minutes later, the hosts of the rope folks lounge, PhoenixEddy & Anicca, appeared.  They sat and chatted with us for a spell. Time eased by, and it was soon 4am. Dov and I politely excused ourselves.

    Apparently Dov had not grab his bag from the Dungeon, having been distracted by another group on the elevator that he wanted to introduce to the show. I decided to follow him down to the lobby, my not-wanting-the-event-to-end thing kicking in.

    As we descended down, we again saw the curtains were drawn on the room. Dov attempted his phone call once more, and this time he was answered. After much jumping up and down, the folks in the room saw us and invited us over. We ran around to their room. Excited talk of planned peep shows for next year followed.

    Dov still did not have his bag though. We again found ourselves on the elevator heading down. When we got to the lobby, fortune smiled on us once more. Jim was there.

    Walking over, we greeted him with a, “Nice show.” We then explained the elevator fun we’d had. He was shocked, but pleased.

    Dov drifted off to find his bag. I stayed to talk with Jim. I mentioned how someone had added to his chest bruises, and recounted my Righteous Beating from earlier in the evening.

    I also spoke about how, even though I’d been stressed with AV duties, I had experienced some amazing scenes that made my WinterFire worth the struggle. And, yah know, he was a part of that.

    After watching a drunk gentleman in the lobby for a few minutes, we decided it was time for bed. Getting on the elevator, I pushed the button for my floor and he for his. But, for some reason, my button didn’t light up. We passed by my floor. I told Jim it was a mistake, but he didn’t believe me as he pushed into one of the easy buttons on my chest.

    We reached his floor.

    I mentioned IMsL, and hopefully seeing him there. As the doors closed, Jim mentioned possibly being in my neck of the woods before then. As a last thought, I said if he did show up in town, he should, yah know, “Call me.” I then face-palmed, upset at my ridiculous display of cliche, as the elevator descended to my floor.

    Creeping into my room as quietly as possibly, I still woke up Murphy and Slut. I quickly recounted my evening before ducking back into the hallway.

    Sitting just outside my door, I took a few minutes to jot down my last journaling notes of my evening. Satisfied, I again quietly made my way back into the room, slipped under the covers, and drifted off to sleep, another WinterFire in my memories.

  • Girl Fight

    So… after Gray’s edict. After Chey & Stefanos & Nerine. After laughing and screeching, boots on flesh and twisted faces of pain. After all that, I still had a scene to oversee.

    It was time for some chicks to fight.

    My whole point for going to Playful & Predicament BDSM was to germinate possible ideas for what was to be my early afternoon: Girl Fight 2.5.

    Girl Fight 1.0 happened before I met SkinnyBitch and PrincessA. I heard the story of the incident, an amazing scene that the two women wanted to repeat. Unfortunately Girl Fight 2.0 was scheduled but did not occur.

    As WinterFire approached, and planning of scenes started, SkinnyBitch mentioned Girl Fight, saying she wanted to have another. With a roommate and friend like me who just so advantageously had rope, and would love to watch two of her friends go at it, I most humbly, joyous, jumping-up-and-down-screeching “Me! Me! Me!” volunteered to help make this happen.

    Since PrincessA would not be at WinterFire, SkinnyBitch had to figure out who else she could rumble. After a few thoughts, she settled on HoopFlyBurn.

    Now looking at the two women, they are somewhat evenly matched. SkinnyBitch ran marathons. HoopFlyBurn was currently slogging her way through the Insanity workouts. And though SkinnyBitch was smaller than HoopFlyBurn, SkinnyBitch was scrappy. In my mind, it was a toss up.

    When I entered my roommate’s hotel room, I was lent a special prop for the scene: SkinnyBitch’s rape whistle. As it hung on my neck, I felt so proud.

    Heading down to the Dungeon, the only open play area for us was the small side Dungeon across the hall from the classes, the first afternoon session just underway. We laid out three large mats. I set the ground rules.

    No eye gouging.
    No closed fist punching.
    There would be three rounds, five minutes a piece. Person who held their opponent down twice would win.
    They had the option of tapping out for a round.

    In attendance for the festivities were DeepEnd, RockStarIsis, Alice, Cairo, LooksRDeceiving, and Amethyst, as well as the other scenes going on in the small room.

    The ladies removed their clothing, down to just their underwear, and we began.

    For each round, I gave the ladies rope predicaments to deal with. For round one, both ladies had their right legs bound. I whistled the start and they began. Surprising only to me, the ladies did not last long. I had not anticipated five minutes being too long of a time span for their rounds. However, all the same, HoopFlyBurn landed the first blow, pinning SkinnyBitch around the three minute mark.

    For round two, SkinnyBitch’s leg remained bound, but HoopFlyBurn now had her arm tied instead. I gave the ladies a little time to breathe before I whistled the round to start; only three minutes for this one. SkinnyBitch, now with the advantage, bested HoopFlyBurn, scoring a pin. They were tied, 1-1.

    It was time for round three.

    Somewhat mimicking the rope in Girl Fight 1.0, I secured crotch ropes on both of the ladies. I then tied simple chest harnesses to each and attached the harnesses to the opposing person’s crotch rope. Because of the extra rope work, again the ladies were given a breather.

    With their binds secure, I whistled the start. Once again, they scrapped on the mats, rolling and twisting, each trying to get an advantage on the other. But, after the three minute round, no woman had bested the other. Both were exhausted, and their audience was left with a tie.

    I loosed their chest harnesses, giving the ladies more time to breathe and take a quick drink. With their crotch ropes still on, it was time for sudden death.

    Two minutes. Winner take all.

    I had the ladies start on the mats at opposite corners. Breathing heavy, ready to see who would win, I threw a length of rope between them. “Have at it.”

    I whistled the start. HoopFlyBurn got to the coil first. SkinnyBitch tried her best to wrench the cord away from HoopFlyBurn. In a desperate, and rather clever effort, HoopFlyBurn flung the rope away. (Later she mentioned how she had no skill when it came to tying and figured her best bet was to just get rid of it all together.)

    The two women grappled, tired, but neither wanting to back down. Finally, with mere seconds left on my iPhone’s timer, using the crotch rope as leverage, SkinnyBitch pinned HoopFlyBurn to the mat. We had our winner, oh scrappy roommate of mine.

    After the laughs and hugs, and cleaning and putting away of the mats, and finding the piece of SkinnyBitch’s nipple ring that fell off, we all happily made our way back to our regularly scheduled WinterFire Sunday.

    I returned the rape whistle, grudgingly.

  • The Doctor

    So…

    My moment journaling in my room took an hour and fifteen minutes. With Jim and Gray fresh on my mind, I had a lot to write about.

    When I ventured back down to the play spaces, I looked about but could not find Gray or his play date. Instead, I sipped an energy drink and sat in the lobby, chatting with friends.

    During my conversations, the Doctor approached with a n95 mask. We had previously planned to have a rope scene, and the moment seemed right to bring our promise to fruition. I told the Doctor to go look for an open arch or hard point. He returned, unable to satisfy my request, as there were still quite a few people playing, even at the late hour. It was coming on 2am.

    We looked around, trying to find room. I suggested, instead of the planned partial suspension, that we try some floor work. Just as we were about to find some open space on the carpet, an arch in the Dungeon hallway opened up. We quickly claimed it.

    As is my preferred way, I asked the Doctor to remove all his clothing, save for his underwear. I rigged my ring to the arch and we began. As I tied, two of his friends sat nearby and watched. Occasionally he spoke to them as I wound my ropes around him.

    I secured the Doctor’s arms behind his back, tying a simple chest harness around his torso. I left his wrists knot open, just in case. Next, I tied a cuff around his left ankle. He said he felt stronger with his right leg, and I wanted him to last as long as possible. Asking him to bend his left leg, I raised the rope up and through my ring, securing it. He held himself up only with his right leg.

    So, we began. I attacked the front of his right thigh, slapping, punching, and abusing it as I wished. The Doctor remembered, from our first play date, that I could be quite mean.

    I pulled out my riding crop and smacked his muscle. Once, I missed, and the Doctor mocked me. I attacked his thigh harder, laughing as I inflicted my pain. He laughed too, as he tried hopping away from my blows.

    I pulled out my drumsticks and beat on him more. The Doctor truly hated my drumsticks.

    The thing I love about playing with the Doctor are his constant stream of comments. When we play, and I beat on him to my heart’s content, he never ceases to make me laugh. When I am topping, I have to laugh. I am causing you pain and it is just so much fun. With the Doctor, he gets my meanness and plays up the hilarity of the scene.

    When the Doctor’s wrists needed attention, I released his hands, but continued to pound his thigh. When he fell, and consequently had all his body weight in my ties, I grabbed his body and righted his footing. Soon, I knew it was time for him to come down.

    I sweetly released him from my binds. He had some pretty bruises from my ropes on his arms, as well as an awesome big bruise forming on his targeted thigh. We hugged. I gathered my things. We finished just as the play spaces closed for the evening.

    I helped gather the iPods and made my way back to my room. As I relaxed on my bed, Slut warned me that Murphy needed some tying and sexy time. I assured her that, with my headphones in, I would easily ignore their amorous affections.

    At 4am, my eyes closed and I passed out. Around 5am I woke to their moans and screams. Soon after, I drifted back into my slumber.

  • Boots

    I started his bootblacking like I had many times before. Lightly lifting his right boot onto my thigh. Cleaning it twice. Scrubbing the catwalk with a toothbrush. Checking for frayed threads to singe down. He, however, decided to not treat me as he had before.

    He lifted his left boot and placed it on my free thigh. He pushed into my flesh. When I lifted his right boot to clean in close, he lightly rubbed my face, my chin. I kissed and caressed his leather as I continued to work.

    He brought his left boot from my thigh to my chest. He pressed into my breast, stepped into my nipple. He kicked my chest, rocking me back. He used his left boot to spread my legs and began lightly kicking my pussy. I had no choice but to pause my work, marveling in the arousal from his torment. His kicks subsided mere seconds away from my orgasm.

    “I was a few breaths away from asking permission.”
    “Then I did you a favor because I would have said no.”

    Finished with his right boot, I began cleaning his left.

    “I was hoping I’d make you loose your place.”

    I smiled to myself, happy to have again risen to a challenge. He continued to press into my flesh, torturing me as I loved his leather.

    When I finished cleaning, I asked if I could kiss his boots. He replied, but I couldn’t hear him. Grabbing me by my nipples, he pulled me up and into his arms.

    “You can after you kiss me.” Again our lips met, playing as we liked. Again he grabbed my hair and pushed me down to his boots.

    My lips softly caressed his leather. My hands massaged him through the barrier. He punched my ass, my back. For a split second, I found it funny that he attacked me from behind while Jim had attacked from the front.

    He reached down and started fingering me. He teased my clit before easing his fingers into my pussy. As his digits entered me, I immediately asked permission. He gave it, and I rode his hand hard through my orgasm.

    Removing his hand, he began slapping my pussy. Over and over stingy pain mixed with my hot arousal. I took his strokes, one after the other, not knowing if I ever wanted him to stop. Hit followed hit; I moaned with the pleasure. Eventually the pain went far beyond my pleasure, and I rolled my body over to avoid his slaps.

    Grabbing my hair, he brought me again to his face.

    “Kiss me. Kiss me. Once you kiss me, you can suck my cock.” He held my hair, keeping my lips from his. When he sought fit, we kissed once again.

    He pulled my head down onto his cock, and I gladly enjoyed his dick in my mouth. Within moments of my glee of finally having his cock in mouth again, I felt the first of his wicked cane strokes. He aimed for my ass, one of his favorite targets. He said he would stop when I stopped sucking his cock.

    I took his hits. In a moment of desperation, I switched to sucking his balls, hoping this was a loop pole in his order. I was given a moment of respite before he began again with his stingy strokes.

    I sucked and sucked, wiggling and squirming my body about trying to avoid his hits. I switched back and forth between his cock and balls, happily sucking away. He grabbed my hair, pushing me down further onto his cock. I practiced my deep throating as he fucked my face.

    He pulled me off of him. Sadly, he tucked his dick away.

    “You made my Punisher face uneven.”
    “He’s smiling.”
    “He can’t be smiling; he’s the Punisher.”
    “As if you couldn’t have a big grin on your face as your inflicting pain.” The vision of him torturing me with his Twisted Bitch during our first play date burst forth in my mind.

    I went back to his boots. Using my Huberd’s, I conditioned his leather. There were a few especially dry spots that I focused on.

    In a moment of pure silly, he used the toes of his boots to push on my breasts and nipples, jiggling them for his amusement. We both laughed.

    “You getting anything out of this?”

    As I continued my conditioning, he again pressed himself into my flesh.

    Finished, I rubbed his chaps, asking if I were to move onto them next. He sadly declined. He had another play date that evening.

    Grabbing my hands, he started to pull me into his lap. Releasing my hands, he grabbed me by my nipples.

    “Having trouble getting up?”
    “No. No. No trouble at all.”

    I straddled his legs; he rested his arms around my waist. Once more we kissed. Again he pinched my nipples. Gripping my breasts, he squeezed hard. With the pain and pleasure rising, I rocked my hips in his lap and asked permission to cum. He granted my request. I breathed hard, and he kissed me as I came.

    He asked me if there were any classes I planned to attend in the morning. I wasn’t certain, as my brain was rather foggy. We agreed to text to coordinate when on Sunday I’d be able to finish my service to his leathers.

    We stood. Surprisingly, he came in close and grabbed my breasts again. I leaned into his body, his chest, gasping. I begged permission. He said yes. I rested in his arms as I breathed heavy and came hard. We hugged.

    On my hands and knees, I collected my kit into my cigar boxes. Ever one for the wacky, he took his rolled up yoga mat and began smacking my ass with it.

    Our things collected, we set off in search of his next play date. With her nowhere to be found, we separated. Not a minute later, she found me. Searching the Dungeon and the Champagne Room, we did not see him. She said she would wait at the bootblacking station.

    I tried upstairs and found him in the lobby. Grabbing him, I brought him to her.

    They set off for their play date. I headed back to my room to grab my rope, and took a moment to journal.

  • Tickling

    “I’ve never let anyone suck on my balls before.”
    “Really?”
    “Yeah, it’s hard to get over the tickling sensation.”
    “Like I said, I get what I want.”

    A huge grin crept across her face. He was bound to his home office chair, his ankles secured to the wheel legs, his wrists to the arm rests. He was completely naked.

    She was too, save for her stiletto leather boots. He wondered what she might do to him with those boots. Wondered as his crotch already throbbed from her tauntings.

    She loved toying with him, playing with his body. She had already pinched and bit his nipples. Had already sucked and bit his neck. Had already glided her tongue up from his ankles, slowly, so slowly, making her way towards his crotch, towards his cock which throbbed from his wanting.

    From their previous fucks, she knew there was something about the base of his shaft, and his balls, that she needed to explore. Before he would gently guide her away, gently shift his hips, manipulating her fun. Now it was her turn to call the shots.

    “Oh. Oh! Fuck. No, not…Whew. Alright. Alright. Oh God! And now you’re switching sides. Fuck. Fuck! Okay I can deal with…Fuck!”

    He wiggled. He squirmed. She smiled and sucked and bit to her heart’s content.

    “Please. Please! You are killing me here.”
    “Whatever do you me?”

    She sunk her face into his crotch, taking up both of his balls in her mouth. Bobbing her head in and out, sucking in time to her movements, her own hips rocked, imagining his hard and wanting cock inside her.

    He gasped. He bucked. He did whatever he could to try to get her mouth off of him, but nothing worked. She had him. All he could do was sit their and take the sweet pain.

    She may have had a mouth full of balls, but most of the enjoyment was on her end. She loved to suck balls, loved the feel of them in her mouth, loved to be so full of them. She loved the texture of the skin, the slick nature of the organs underneath, how they’d pop in and out of her mouth, elusive little buggers. And she loved men’s reactions when she licked, nipped, and sucked as none other had done for them before.

    His reaction was a new one. Others moaned, amazed at her fervor and glee. Some would push her face in further; she loved those, men who enjoyed her ball sucking as much as she did. But she also loved this new reaction, this unexpected out-of-left-field sensation she could give him.

    “I can do this. I can do this.”
    “Do what? Oh, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t talk when my mouth’s full.”

    He laughed, then gasped as she again sought the base of his shaft.

    “What!?! What do I…What do I have to do…ooo ooo ooo…to make you stop?”
    “But I’m having fun. Why would I want to?”

    She switched. And switched. And switched. He pulled at his bindings. He rocked his hips. She treated him so sweetly, yet so horribly.

    “Oh God! Oh God!”
    “It’s nice that you’re thanking him; I know I’m that good.”
    “Fu…uck! I just want to cum!”
    “Oh, I know.”

    She quickly engulfed his cock in her mouth.

    “Shit!”

    She squeezed the base of his cock hard. Rapidly she bobbed her head up and down, sucking and stroking as hard as she could. Saliva dribbled out of her mouth and onto his cock. Her hands were soon soaked. His moans grew loud. His obscenities continued.

    She increased her speed. Up and down. Up and down. The slurping was almost comical, but all the laughing was done.

    If his hands were not bound, they would have been tangled in her hair, which flew everywhere as her head continued to ride the length of him. She occasionally pushed the strands away, but to no avail.

    Finally, torturously, he felt his cum rise.

    “Shit, I’m cuming. I’m cuming.”

    She didn’t stop, but instead increased her speed. Unable to hold on, he shot into her mouth; one, two, three spurts. Some found its way on her hands, on her lips, dribbled onto his crotch. And some she savored, enjoying it for herself. Lifting her hand, he also licked up the cum, sucking it off her fingers.

    She rose, leaning into him. Her face hovered a few inches from his. He still breathed hard, but also could not take his eyes off hers.

    “You are so fucking good, and so fucking horrible.”
    “I’m not horrible; I just get what I want.”

    She lightly kissed his lips, and then slowly untied him.

  • Rigger vs Rigger

    Rope Camp Memories continued…

    With Gray off to the Dungeon, I grabbed his things, as well as my own, and left. I first swung by my cabin. I dropped off my shot glasses and put on my Zim jacket, as it was getting chilly. I put my flashlight in my pocket, as well, remembering the night before. All set, I walked up to 1/2 and put Gray’s things by and on his bed. I then made my way to the competition.

    When I walked in, I saw that just about every seat was filled. I think most, if not all, of camp was there. I quickly found Gray, who thankfully sat at the end of an aisle. He’d given me permission to be at his knee, knowing he would not have time for aftercare following our class. I returned his safety shears, which he had lost during the presentation, but I found.

    As I sat on the floor, I began to surmise the competition. Murphy and Dov each had their bottoms tied with random objects attached. I later learned these were props chosen by audience members (flippers, picture frame, goggles, etc.). I’d already heard they were only allowed sixty feet of rope, which most likely would translate into two thirty foot lengths, though this was not required. As far as the organizers cared, a rigger could’ve showed up with 60 one foot lengths and have been perfectly within the rules of the battle.

    Murphy was working with his friend; Dov worked with Slut. The emcee walked out into the event area, and asked the audience to decide who had won through their applause. After three rounds of clapping, it was decided Murphy & Dov had tied, and would team up for the final.

    Next up was a fetish performance by Lew Rubens. The big reveal: bungee suspension. Drea, Lew’s girl, came out in just a lacy boxer style underwear and black & white heels. Lew tied her in a chest harness, but then got to work on the bungee chord. Using multiple lengths and looping them through a pulley, Lew attached Drea to the rig. He then walked over to the wall and cranked the pulley higher with a wench.

    As she got higher and higher, Drea started jumping around. Lew, once at his preferred height, took hold of Drea, pulled her back, and let go. She flew this way and that. Drea was able to jump, bouncing side to side and about.

    Lew tried to hit her with different implements, but she would playfully jump away. Lew then tried to time his hits with her jumps. All the while, the audience vacillated between Ooos, Ahhs, and laughs. Loud applause followed the conclusion of his presentation.

    Next up, Gray vs. Lochai. Their bottoms were Phoenix and Celeste, respectively. Before they started, Gray leaned down and asked to borrow one my carabiners; he had an idea.

    As the competition began, it seemed Lochai had the same thought. Lochai immediately went to the pulley and began tying Celeste for a suspension. Gray started his tie on Phoenix, choosing to first be sensuous, but then turned silly when he began using his candy cane prop. This ended, though, when the candy cane broke. In a moment of theatre, Gray, quite manly, ripped off his shirt.

    Moving Phoenix towards the pulley, Gray pulled out my carabiner and attached it, allowing him to also suspend. To impede Gray, Lochai started tying him up. Gray returned the favor, and the battle was on.

    Lochai moved away, rushing off to the wench. He cranked the pulley higher as Gray rushed to complete his tie on Phoenix. As Lochai cranked, Celeste ended up hitting her head. An “ugh” cycled through the audience, but Celeste was okay. And just as it was almost too late, just as the ropes were almost out of his reach, Gray finished his tie on Phoenix.

    The battle complete, the decision was left to the audience. And, once again, there was a tie. Gray & Lochai were to team up against Murphy & Dov for the final round.

    The next performer up: Scott Smith. His big reveal: watermelons. Scott explained he agreed to give a rope performance if he were allocated a tarp and two watermelons.

    Yes, watermelons.

    To setup, Slut and Darian laid out a rather large blue tarp. Scott’s girl scurried to the front and put out two miniature traffic cones and a miniature barricade on the floor; I found her to be very cute.

    Parker and Scott’s girl were already tied in harnesses. A large ladder was brought out. Scott had setup a few points earlier. He walked up the ladder and attached Parker to one. The ladder was them moved and Scott’s girl was attached to another. A mesh bag, filled with the two watermelons, was attached to the last. Yes, this is going there.

    Scott asked for Gray’s assistance. He was instructed merely to hold Parker, pulled away from the plumb of Parker’s point, while Scott held his girl the same way. Then they both let go.

    Parker and Scott’s girl crashed into the mesh bag of watermelons, and each other. One broke, and spilled a little juice and fruit onto the tarp. “Do it again! Do it again!” I was not the only person in the audience yelling; many of us were quite enthusiastic in our want for the second one to break.

    Satisfying the need of the masses, Gray and Scott both pulled back and released once more. Parker and Scott’s girl once again slammed into each other, this time crushing both fruits to everyone’s satisfaction. Watermelon fell onto the tarp as Parker and Scott’s girl reached into the mesh bag and ripped out pieces to eat. Everyone laughed their asses off.

    Thus Scott Smith was dubbed the Gallagher of the Rope World.

    And now, for the final round; Dov & Murphy vs Lochai & Gray.

    For this last battle, the rules were modified. Only one bottom was allowed. For Gray & Lochai, Phoenix and Celeste Rock-Paper-Scissored for the position; Phoenix got the spot. Murphy & Dov had a ringer in their back pocket, electing to use Lqqkout as their bottom, which technically wasn’t against the rules, but still…

    The music started; the battle began. Both groups had had a quick moment time to pow wow. Gray & Lochai began by lifting Phoenix into the air over their shoulders and tying her at both ends. The trio of Murphy, Dov & Lqqkout had the brilliant idea of cutting their rope, in hopes of lengthening their strands and increasing their tying abilities. Once again, this was not against the rules, but come the fuck on… Turns out, though, their idea was not so great. Their rope soon turned to a tangled mess.

    Before the round started, Gray had given Lochai his safety shears. Gray turned to Lochai and told him it was time. Lochai snipped the top of Gray’s boxers. Gray then ripped off the top pair, revealing his secret weapon: a pair of sequined, chained, awesome boxers he had purchased the first night of camp. Only I, the vendor who sold them, and CabEx knew about them; the rest of the audience was shocked and awed. The crowd roared.

    But then, somehow, it became a three-on-one competition: Gray vs the Trio. Lochai took the pretty girl off into a corner while Gray was attacked from all sides. Gray tried to counter their attacks by tying them, at one point attaching a small weight to one of them.

    A 5 Hour Energy dropped out of Murphy’s pocket. Gray picked it up, poured it into his mouth, and then spit it out in a burst of liquid. In the cross fire, Dov was momentarily blinded. Somehow, Lqqkout ended up with three flippers on, two on his feet and one on a hand. Gray, during the battle, had a quick negotiation with Lqqkout for a CBT tie.

    There was also some wrestling between Murphy and Gray, which ended up with them grappling on the ground. Needless to say, I freaked out a little, and began yelling. “His back. His back. Oh my God, Gray’s back. Watch out for his back.” At one point, Gray and Murphy rolled over, breaking an oar in half that was one of the assigned props. (Incidentally, the two men saved the pieces as mementos.)

    By the end of the second song, the only person that had any rope work complete was Lochai, who had Phoenix in a pretty tie on the side. Lqqkout, in response, rushed over and knelt beside Phoenix. Dov came over and tied a bow around Lqqkout’s hands.

    Once again, the emcee asked the audience for applause to determine the winner. It was eventually decided, “I think it’s the audience that won.”

    The whole event was beyond hilarious. It was one of those instances where you wished they had taken video of it because it was so much fun.

  • Midori Wants Ice Cream

    Today’s blog is another fun Rope Camp memory I wish to impart.

    After the opening night’s Meet & Greet, which originally was to be smores around the campfire, but was moved into Dungeon because of the rain, members of NYR Cabin congregated towards the front entrance, ready to take on an important mission: Midori, an amazing woman and rope goddess we all love and admire, wanted ice cream. As Gray, Murphy, and Dov brainstormed about transportation, I quietly said, “I have a car.” With the addition of NYR Cabin Meat’s vehicle, our formiddable caravan was set.

    In a quirky moment in the parking lot, people debated who would go in which car.
    “Gray. Murphy. Dov. Sasha. My car!”
    “So that’s what your Dom voice sounds like.” Actually, Gray, it was my lead voice. I saw a problem and took control of the situation to get us to a solution. That’s why they pay me the big bucks.

    Traveling through the wet warm night, we soon made our way to 7-11. Along with partaking in ice cream, there was a collective desire for Slurpees. To everyone’s amazment, I admitted to never having had one before. This needed to be remedied.

    The commemorative cups at the time featured a hot profile picture of Daniel Craig, therefore I had to buy one. Only thing is, the cup was the Super Big Gulp, the largest possible Slurpee I could have purchased.

    Big Bro, being kind of heart and empty of stomach, offered to kill said drink with me. Stepping up to the Slurpee machine, I chose the Coco-Cola flavor and filled my cup up to the top, including its dommed lid. Paying for all our drinks and ice cream, we quickly huddled up for a group photo before heading back to camp.

    The inspiration for our Slurpee purchases came from Midori, who thought of a fun way to prank the attendees at Rope Camp. We were going to “Slurpee” their scenes: encircling their space and staring at their work, everyone sipping on their drinks while queitly commenting. It was to be like Glee, but without the mess. Unfortunately there were few people in the Dungeon when we came back, leaving us only the pleasure of Slurpee-ing a scene with Scott Smith, who found our presence amusing.

    After our fun, we all gathered in Cabin 2, and toasted to NYR with sake, a fitting start to an amazing Rope Camp.

  • Turkey Day Edition of Photo Friday

    Folks, I apologize for my noted absence from this blog. It’s not been on purpose that I’ve lacked in my postings. Instead, it is for this…

    the many many scarves I’ve been knitting & crocheting for family and friends, in lieu of buying presents this year. Yes, I know it seems as if I’m not stimulating the economy like a nice little American consumer, but as you can see by this mound of yarn…

    I am in fact doing my part to keep craft stores alive.

    On that note, I present more photos for your enjoyment.

    The junk in my truck.

    More awesome cloud shots.

    Fun with trees…

    and leaves.

    And finally, the joy of perspective, aka My Humongous Hand!

    Happy Thanksgiving!

  • Photo Friday

    I’ve been at this whole blogging thing for a while now, so I thought I might start a little series I’m calling Photo Friday. I carry a crappy little digital camera in one of my cargo pockets wherever I go. As such, I get shots of some of the interesting moments of my days. Here is a wrap up of the past week, along with a few shots I just love.


    Clouds

    Yesterday, on my drive to pick up the SO, the sky was filled with this amazing pattern in the clouds. I could not recall seeing anything like this before, so I took pictures while driving. And before someone comments about how dangerous this is, I placed the camera on the steering wheel and didn’t look through the view finder to aim. I just snapped a few, hoping they would turn out. And they did.


    Leaves

    On a rather windy day last week, leaves literally blew into the office and all over the floor. The next day I eventually swept them up and deposited them back outside, where they belonged.

    Orange

    One day at work, I had an orange with lunch. I was able to get the entire rind off in one piece, and the shape looked interesting. So I started playing around with different ways to pose it and shoot it. If I could have, I would have saved it. It was fun to play with and looked awesome. Definitely my best peel to date.

    Pumpkins


    Last Friday, I went to a pumpkin party at some friends’ home. (BTW: love their house; they are very handy and have already made things look better since they moved in, with more fixes to come. And yes, I will use them for my first home, assuming that happens sometime in my lifetime.)

    1- Hand model, I am not, but I still thought it looked cool, the string of gunk that comes when you pop the top of your pumpkin.

    2- That’s a shot of the front of my pumpkin, though in retrospect I should have taken photos of the sides as well. I carved out the Obama O and a tree on two of the sides, but not the back. Didn’t want to ruin the front effect.

    3- Lights on.

    4- Lights off.

    Getting my hands dirty and carving my yearly pumpkin was a lot of fun, even though half the party bailed.

    I brought a baker’s dozen cupcakes from Cakelove. First time experiencing their food. Will definitely be back. Seriously delicious cupcakes, well worth the price. Two favorites: red velvet & German chocolate cake.

    And thus concludes this week’s Photo Friday. More to come in the weeks ahead.

  • Advantages of a Ghetto Movie Theatre

    I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I am deathly afraid of scary movies. Like ridiculously so. Like I couldn’t sleep in my dorm room for five days after seeing The Ring, kept noticing the figure of a young girl in a white gown out of the corner of my eye, ran out of said room the first night, scared-the-shit-out-of-me frightened when it comes to scary movies.

    So when I tell you I enjoyed watching Paranormal Activity, you should know something was up.

    First, it is true when they tell you your experience of a movie completely depends on where you see it. If I had seen this flick in a theatre with just my SO and myself, I probably won’t have been able to sleep Monday night. But we were not alone, by any stretch of the term. In fact, for a Monday night, you could say the theatre was downright crowded.

    Second, for a person like me, how I dress is important. I went into the theatre, expecting to see Capitalism: A Love Story, but the internet lied to me. Capitalism was not showing and my only other options were Surrogates (no way in hell) & Meatballs (might be cute, but no). Considering I wanted to watch a movie that night, I bit the bullet and joined my SO for his show. But, I had a secret advantage: my home made scarf.

    I love my scarf. It’s warm, and long, giving me multiple different ways of wearing it. For Paranormal Activity, I used it to cover my eyes during certain points that I knew had the possibility of burning into my brain. Lets just say I saw the bottom half of the screen for the final five minutes and I am all the better for it.

    Third, and most important of all, there were some ghetto ass people in this movie theatre. I had not been to this particular establishment in some time. Therefore I had no clue how much the clientele had changed. Phones going off multiple times, yelling at the screen, giggling and making fun of the movie abounded.

    And you know what: they made me laugh. I was literally laughing so hard at the end of the show, my cheeks hurt. Me, the person who couldn’t finish watching Seven (though, to be fair, I saw it when I was 12 years old; very bad idea). I was laughing and happy I had seen Paranormal Activity.

    Granted I didn’t have the experience a true “reviewer” should have. I was most defiantly influenced by the atmosphere in which I saw this show. But, as such, I must now recommend it. It is a slow build movie, much like the old school black and white films. And there are moments you just do not see coming. Well worth a matinee fee, or, if you’re in a good mood, full price. And if you’re a scaredy cat like me, go see it with friends who won’t be afraid to call a spade a spade, or make fun of the characters and you for being so scared.