Three and a half. 

I found three and a half grey pubic hairs.

I am offended.

I had previously seen one grey pubic hair before.  Ever time it emerged, I plucked it and tried to forget its existence.

Recently, I had not been trimming my pubic hair.  People do random things to amuse themselves while in our current isolation.  Mine was letting my pubic hair grow longer than it has been since high school.  With the length came the discovery of a second hair.  The one I knew about was on the right.  But then I saw one on the left.

Pluck.

And then a second one on the right, only farther down, therefore normally out of my view.

Pluck.

And then, to my dismay, I looked on the left again, saw a hair and thought, “Is that grey? Or is a trick of my eyes?”

Pluck.

I shit you not, folks: it was half grey.  As if, when it began growing, the melanocytes were taking a nap. But then, in the middle of growing, they woke and said, “Shit, we’re supposed to be working” and thus affixed melanin to the bottom half of the hair. 

Yes, the grey portion was the top half.

BUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

I am the first person to admit my pussy has had an excellent run.  Fists.  Dicks.  Other things too have made their way into me, and it has been glorious.  Unfortunately, I cannot say that as of late.  Besides my dildo, my pussy has been lonely in 2020 and for a good portion of 2019 as well.

But damn body, three and a half grey pubic hairs!?

It seems excessive, almost judgmental.  I am still young.  I haven’t even pushed out procreation yet. 

Can’t the salt-and-pepper wait until I at least have spawn!?

Truth be told, this is probably life having a little fun at my expense.  Pictures of my father late in his life show he had salt-and-pepper coloring: grey at the temples and full through his mustache. 

Mother nature, I guess, just decided to locate my slow loss of melanin a little farther south.    

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